PSALM 84

If I had to pick the top five Biblical characters that I feel most sorry for, Old Testament Saul would be one of them. God appoints Saul to a position that he never learns to trust God in. Saul sees himself as small even though he is king of all Israel. Saul disobeys but blames his disobedience on others and attempts to justify his mistakes. And the words the Bible has to say at Saul's death: "So Saul died for his breach of faith. He broke faith with the Lord in that he did not keep the command of the Lord, and also consulted a medium, seeking guidance. He did not seek guidance from the Lord. Therefore the Lord put him to death and turned the kingdom over to David the son of Jesse." 1 Chronicles 10:13-14 Yep that's the ending for the obedience is better than sacrifice rebellion is as witchcraft guy. These are verses that I have to constantly be reminded of. Sometimes it even seems that my sacrifice would be more effective than obedience. But Saul did what h...

A week ago today I merrily sent the majority of my luggage ahead. I intended to follow close behind with my last humanitarian bag and a plane ticket. A week later the bags are still ahead. I'm still behind. No plane ticket to speak of nor funds to fly across the country- let alone a continent. My pastor preached a message this past Sunday about the next step. One of his points was that what the next step should be is a matter of perception, often shaped by our spiritual gifting. Administrative Martha thinks one thing. Forever Faithful Mary thinks another. Who is right? Finally I have been corrected a lot this week. Disobedience identified and confessed to. Lessons taught and hopefully learned. School of Christ is what my spiritual mother calls it. And much like the child who loses recess never wished for playtime to end so quickly- I can't wait for this lesson to be concluded. Faith that it'll work out is like tracing the path of the sun across the sky. Faith in th...

Confession: Delays= Problem in Me Did you follow my instructions? Mostly. Almost. Sort of. Except for... So then the answer is no. This scenario happened a few months ago when I was trying to speak with my spiritual mom. Delay. Obstacle. I asked God why and He said it was because of me! I had only partially followed an instruction. Fast Forward a few months. "I'll tell you the date when you are ready to buy the ticket. " Meanwhile I presumed the best date for the work in Uganda and began planning around that, speaking, according to that, taking work off according to that, even acting in faith according to MY PLANS. (Mind you faith is to be placed in God not ourselves or our own ability to accomplish a task.) My plans and your plans are not = to God's plans unless they come from Him. So my plans failed. Fell flat and left me disappointed, discouraged, confused, and upset! Until I realized that they were mine, not His. No one to be mad at but me. Sin o...

IDK=Be Still Today I don't have too much to say. When I was a camp counselor I was trained in low ropes. One of the ways we prepared a team to work together was by blindfolding them and asking them to follow our voice into the woods. Of course there would be a time in which we stopped speaking. There were three kinds of participants. Type 1 kept walking anyways even though they no longer had any guiding voice. Type 2 stopped at first, but as the silence grew unbearable they tried to figure out how to keep moving themselves. Finally Type 3 just patiently waited until guidance returned. We of course likened this activity to following God. I remembered this exercise today. It describes how I feel. Blindfolded in the woods. I Don't Know= Be Still

"Your breathing can have a profound effect on the efficacy of your stretching routine. Breathe improperly, and you'll see little improvement in flexibility, but breathe properly, and you'll grow more flexible much more quickly." http://www.3fatchicks.com/how-important-is-breathing-during-stretching/ I am guessing that the author of fat chicks knows what she is talking about. God knows that lately He has had me doing some faith breathing exercises. People will ask how are you? How is the trip coming? And I have to explain to them that what I have been feeling is faith breathing. Much like when expectant moms go to Lamaze classes to practice breathing- it seems only like an exercise. When the baby is coming, the breathing becomes more than an exercise, it becomes key to the delivery.  Now with departure less than a week away, the breathing is becoming key. Uganda is unique in that this is the first time I have traveled internationally without a team in 5 ...

I was walking a route I never take; blabbing on the phone; trying to stay dry under my purple umbrella; just focused on me. When onto my path stumbled a drenched kitten barely six inches in length. My heart collapsed in compassion as little mews came from its mouth as it stumbled about.  I knew that I had to intercede on behalf of the kitten. There was a busy road less than a yard away and I knew that fatality wasn't a fictional concern. But I didn't know what to do. My building is supposed to be pet free. It was after  5 PM  and  I had no idea where a pet shelter was located. On the brink of tears I wrestled with what to do.  I couldn't leave it there to die- but should I break the rules of my apartment complex? Just when I was about to call an animal lover friend, a man came sauntering by.  He asked if the little ball of fur was mine. The story of me stumbling upon the kitten spilled from my lips as I really was torn about what to do. I wa...