I was speaking with a friend the other night, and she commented that she didn’t remember the last time I was so happy. The reason she couldn’t remember was because any sort of happiness I had experienced previously had been so fleeting. She and I had met at the end of 2020. My whole life had gone through restructuring, so 2021 seemed promising. Purposeful but painful is what 2021 turned out to be. Rather than height to height, 2021 traversed heights to valleys. What was hopeful collapsed. What was stable shifted to shaky. And what was foreign and unknown became my safety zone. I went from the familiar streets of DC to the mountains of North Carolina. I went from being one of many almost everywhere I went, to one of the only African Americans in the area. It was hard. Injustice was real, and the marriage I had been hoping for had imploded. 2022 brought new everything. New job. New place to live. New title: single mom. Constant change in which I found it hard to find more than...
It sounds like what’s the big whoop? I’m sure most would hope that would be true 2, 10, 20 years! But we separated over 2 years ago! I filed for divorce over a year ago. Yet, here we are, still! “Final” hearing over 4 months ago. Marriage is definitely meant to be binding, and I am not a believer of I just married the wrong person. But what about when the person doesn’t want to be married to you? What about when the person engages in abusive behaviors towards you? Less than 5 months into my marriage I had to face dilemmas no newlywed should. It was my life that spun into a nightmare. It was my life that had looked so promising and then became so ugly. I had to wrestle with thoughts of immediate divorce vs trying to work it out/ believe God/ anything but divorce. I chose the God will fix it path. And I believed He would. Then as time went on I changed to the God can fix it camp. But as months passed, and conversations looped, and counseling continued to be refus...